Birdist Rule #49: How to Dress for Birding

Your normcore doesn鈥檛 impress me, and it sure doesn't impress the birds either.

I鈥檓 not a gearhead. I鈥檓 too cheap to care about buying the latest stuff (I still listen to my iPod classic). I don鈥檛 really understand what kind of engine my car has. I still wear whatever clothes I had in college that still fit and don鈥檛 have visible rips and stains. It鈥檚 just who I am.

Thankfully, birding is a perfect hobby for the gear-averse. Yes, some thinking needs to go into which pair of binoculars you buy, but once you have a pair that gels, you won鈥檛 need a new one for a long time. I鈥檝e had my binoculars for almost 10 years now, and they still work great. The same goes for your spotting scope and camera鈥攊f you decide to spring for them.

In general, casual birding doesn鈥檛 require a lot of gear, but that doesn鈥檛 mean companies aren鈥檛 constantly coming up with new products and insisting that birders need them. Case in point: birding clothes.

I agree that it鈥檚 good to think ahead before you go outside, and be prepared for sun and bugs and heat and whatever. But unless you鈥檙e expecting some serious weather or, of course, you have medical needs, you really don鈥檛 need to own or wear any special clothing to go birding.

Yet, for whatever reason, a lot of birders won鈥檛 leave the house unless they鈥檙e dressed like they鈥檙e going on an African safari. Khaki everything. A ton of pockets. A million zippers. All that鈥檚 missing is a pith helmet and a rifle. Let鈥檚 discuss some more of the classic pieces found in many birders鈥 closets.

Wide-Brimmed Hats (a.k.a., safari, outdoor, or bucket hats). I see so many birders wearing these that I wonder if I missed a free giveaway somewhere. I think I understand why people have them (they鈥檙e good for sun protection?) but I can鈥檛 help thinking that they all look like or a late-90s . Even the president of the 爆料公社 thinks birders have a floppy-hat problem.

Multi-Pocketed Khaki Vests. What are people putting in all those pockets anyway? Birdseed? Canisters of undeveloped film from the 1990s? Old ticket stubs from an Earth, Wind & Fire concert? No one needs that many pockets. These days you can fit entire field guides on your smartphone, and the rest can go in a backpack. Leave the vest at home.

Pants That Zip Away at the Knee. I guess people have a hard time figuring out if they should wear pants or shorts when they leave the house. Personally, I make the decision using that time-honored method of 鈥渃hecking the temperature.鈥 I support the wearing of zip-off pants only if you wear them with one leg on and one leg zipped off. Also, rip-off warmup sweats are cool鈥攊f you鈥檙e planning to shoot layups while ID-ing that vireo.

Shirts With Those Vents in the Back. I see a lot of people wearing these long-sleeved shirts with big slits in the back. They鈥檙e to let airflow in, I guess. Are people鈥檚 backs getting super-sweaty? Look, if that鈥檚 a problem you鈥檙e looking to solve, go for it, but I think shirts work just fine without showing random, sometimes hairy bits of skin.

Okay, so those are a bunch of things you shouldn鈥檛 wear. What should you wear to go birding? How about . . . clothes. Just, regular clothes.

It鈥檚 on you, my bird-curious friend, to change the tide of public birding perception. You don鈥檛 need to wear zip-off pants: You can just wear pants, or shorts. You don鈥檛 need to wear a bucket hat with gills and special mosquito repellent fibers: You can just wear a hat. You don鈥檛 need to wear a vest with a million pockets: You can just wear, like, literally .

I鈥檓 not trying to be a jerk. I鈥檓 just saying that it鈥檚 okay not to buy into from the gear industry that tell you that you need to buy certain things to be a better birder. If it鈥檚 going to be hot out, wear shorts and bring lots of water and sunscreen. If you鈥檙e going to get muddy, wear boots. It really doesn鈥檛 need to get any more detailed than that.

Coincidentally, 爆料公社 has put together a to dressing like a birder without going full-on psychopath. Look at all the things! No khaki! So pleasant looking!

I鈥檓 here to tell you that birding can be cool. And coolness, as everyone knows, comes from not caring what anyone thinks. We don鈥檛 need to dress like we鈥檙e headed up Mt. Everest if we鈥檙e just taking half the day to bird in the park. We don鈥檛 need some company to tell us how many pockets we need, or tell us that we can鈥檛 trust ourselves to decide whether to wear pants or shorts. Be cool. Wear whatever you want. We can change birding . . . one bucket hat at a time.